March 2012
49 posts
2 tags
A Mysterious Discovery
Miles up a snowy mountainside, in the midst of the wilderness, I came upon a curious relic with crude symbols inscribed on its surface, suggestive of a long-extinct race of barbarians.
What was it? I wondered. What did they mean, these tribal markings? Were they denominations of currency? Guidelines of sorts? Were they prophecies of what was to come? Was this a religious talisman, ...
February 2012
36 posts
The lust for comfort murders the passions of the soul.
– Khalil Gibran
An Inuit hunter asked the local missionary priest:
“If I did not know about God...
– Annie Dilliard, Pilgrim at Tinker Creek
1 tag
Holy shit, The Walking Dead is absolute torture to watch. Agony every step of the way. There is something about a walking corpse that has always fascinated me. The draining of a loved one’s life…. the body emptied of a soul, of emotion, but the brain stem reanimated to walk (or crawl) and consume on living flesh, never sated. Any flesh will do, whether it’s animal flesh or...
1 tag
2 tags
Homos Exuality
I read somewhere online today the phrase “indulging in homosexuality”, its speaker no doubt riddled with secret depravities.
I pictured myself chatting with an acquaintance, perhaps while swirling a tumbler of Ardbeg, the other hand demurely smoothing the front of my cocktail dress (why is it that in all of my daydreams I am wearing a cocktail dress?). My acquaintance would bring up...
1 tag
1 tag
Antonio
Antonio’s attempts to win over my girlfriend have been thwarted- for now.
The latest news is that Jackie has a Latin admirer. Not, not me. Another Latin admirer. Name’s Antonio. He lives down the street, and we heard through the grapevine that Jackie makes his heart skip a beat. With a name like Antonio, it is only natural that he be something of a lothario.
It’s the way he acts that bothers us-...
1 tag
I’ll cheer for you just because you’re you. I’ll cheer when you’re on a journey,...
– My best friend, Sarah
3 tags
How to Cook Dinner Stoned
1. Decide to cook dinner for your crippled, aging girlfriend.
2. Ask her what she wants (whole wheat pasta with marinara). Walk into the kitchen and pull out pasta ingredients. Decide to get a little high, because you can.
3. Exit the kitchen; enter the bathroom. Do a hit of from the bowl of weed on the counter. Do another.
4. Wash your hands and dry them. Tidy the counter top. Glance in the...
1 tag
Oh, my name is Antonio
And I have a potty
And I pee in the potty
Because...
– Watching my neighbor’s toddler inspired me to compose my first song on the mandolin, using the three chords I learned.
1 tag
I'm more of a prude than I thought.
This morning the sun shone brilliantly, but the temperature was in the early 30s. Before I set off on my bicycle, I mummified myself in long johns, a pair of jeans, a sweater and a dress over that, a hooded sweatshirt over that, along with a fleece cap, mittens over thin gloves, a coat and a scarf which I’d wrapped around my mouth and nose so that only my eyes were visible.
As I rounded the...
But don’t forget who you really are. And I’m not talking about your so-called...
– Louis Sachar
Start saving your
pennies now. People
spend $300 (£190) on
crazy things all...
– Madonna
3 tags
2 tags